In A Blink Of An Eye..

I've been following an excellent documentary about our local food heritage, named "Foodage", on our local free to air channel. Being a massive foodie (just a nice term to justify my gluttony), I love following any program about food, but this one was of particular interesting because it was about our history as well. 

I love history very much, and it's also because of my interest in history that started me scuba diving (for those of you interested in scuba diving, you can follow my blog on scuba diving. Yes, I do have a lot to say about everything). It wasn't just about knowing the facts about what had happened, but I also enjoy looking at pictures reflecting the yesteryears. Last night's episode followed a local writer, Sylvia Toh Paik Choo, as she walked down Orchard Road and reminisced what stood where along the stretch of Orchard Road which had been massively redeveloped over the last 5 years. 


Lots of wonderful old brand names were thrown up, such as the Fitzpatricks, Yaohan and A&W. I remembered vividly Fitzpatricks and Yaohan, both of which were located in Bukit Timah Plaza, a shopping centre that was a stone's throw away from my parents' home (where I grew up). For those who are familiar with the new Bukit Timah Plaza (that is provided, if anyone really does read this blog.. apart from my ever supportive wife!), Fitzpatricks used to stand at the stretch where the aerobics studio and Popular bookstore now is, whereas Yaohan occupied the present premises of NTUC Finest.

I remembered the fanfare of Yaohan's opening at Bukit Timah Plaza in 1982. They brought in daiko drummers from Japan and I could hear the drums as the bus I was traveling home from school passed Bukit Timah Plaza. There was so much buzz about it and all my schoolmates made plans to visit the store. It was massively exciting for everyone, and it also marked the entry of international brands coming into Singapore as the global trade became a fact of life. Yaohan, a Japanese retail group, first opened in Singapore at Plaza Singapura and it was a destination for my family during our family outings, which would start off with us bundling into the bus towards the famous old Swee Kee chicken rice restaurant along Bras Basah Road, followed by a visit to the games arcade at the top floor of Yaohan, while my mum would go window shop at the departmental store. 

I honestly don't know much of the economics of those days, but I do believe that Yaohan opened in Plaza Singapura in 1974 to cater to the sizable Japanese expatriate community here, many of whom worked in the electronics, manufacturing and maritime industries. I was chummy with a Japanese boy named Takeshi, whose family was our neighbour. I remember him sharing his manga of Ultraman with me, and I remembered that neither of us could speak much of each other's language, but with kids, our common love of Japanese cartoons was a language we both understood.

I learnt from last night's program that the opening of the first MacDonald's at Liat Towers in 1979 (I believe it's where Starbucks and Burger King now stands)  served up a world record for the most number of burgers served in a day. But the first fast food restaurant to come to Singapore was A&W in 1966 along Dunearn Road. I used to pass the restaurant on my way to secondary school where it stood along the canal with its distinctive Minangkabau style thatched roof. Many older (just slightly older) Singaporeans remember the famous root beer float and also its Coney dog, which is hot dog on a bun, drizzled with brown sauce with ground beef. Honestly, the sauce reminds of the consequences of a bad curry dinner, but Kat remembers "Coney dog Tuesday" really well. Singaporeans would squeal at the sight of an A&W restaurant when they travel overseas, and in fact, many who drive to Malaysia would stop at the Ayer Keroh rest stop along the North South Highway just to get their A&W fix. In fact, according to Wikipedia, there have been numerous online petitions to bring A&W back to Singapore (a check on Facebook turns up several such pages). 

Before 7-Eleven opened in 1983, our grocery needs were filled by "ma and pa" shops as well as the ubiquitous "mama" stalls which were the forerunners of the modern convenience stalls. It sold everyday items like newspapers, cigarettes, snacks, simple medication, etc, manned by ethnic Indians who usually hail from India. They were literally corner stalls, and operating out of a literal hole in the wall and is usually stuffed chock a block with merchandise. There was one at my parents' place and I literally grew up with it. The place changed hands just once or twice, so it was basically the same faces since I was a kid. Typical of a mama stall, they knew almost everyone in the neighbourhood since they were the only convenience store for many years, and they were friends to many of the neighbours as well. I was surprised to still see the same man at the stall when I came back from my studies overseas, although he was a lot older. It was a sad indication, a reflection of how fast the years have gone by, how I've grown up, how my own parents have aged. I moved away from home and set up my own, and one day when I came back, the old mama stall was gone. 

Much in Singapore has changed in such a short span of time, and in a blink of an eye, institutions that I had grown up with, are now no more, many of whom have lasted for age. Sounds a lot like life, doesn't it?

When It Is Time To Let Go

I had fully intended to publish the second installment of my trip report to Thailand, but recent developments have meant that it would be inappropriate for me to post my trip report during a period of mourning. You see, my mother-in-law passed away on 13 August 2011. I had thought long and hard about the wisdom on blogging about this since it would mean opening up the wound each time my wife Kat reads this. But rather than recollecting the painful details, I'd like to celebrate her last days, and reflect.

My mother-in-law had been ailing for the last 11 years, and my father-in-law's life revolved around her, bringing her to her treatments and tending to her needs. I was teaching scuba at the island of Tioman when I received news of her passing, and I made a 7 hour journey to be with my wife during her hour of grief. During the funeral rites, various members of the family had spoken to me about my mother-in-law, stories of her last days, and through those unrelated stories, I was able to piece together her last days which lifted my sadness and gloom. And I hope that each time my wife reads this, she will share in the joy which I had gotten from the stories, and I hope that others will be able to find the sunshine in the passing of their loved ones.


I must confess that my parents-in-law pretty much spoil me rotten, and being the only son-in-law (she had two daughters) meant that I was well taken of whenever we made the trip up to Kuala Lumpur to visit them. One of my fondest memories of her was us watching Nick Park's "Shaun the Sheep" on cable TV together, a programme she always enjoyed chuckling along to. The last time I saw her was when Kat and I got married in our customary wedding in Kuala Lumpur in June, and as Kat mentioned, she looked so happy in the photographs. 

Just like most parents, getting her daughter off to a good man was a matter of much vexing for my mother-in-law. According to a distant relative, Uncle Billy, who had been cutting her hair for years, she would often lament about how career driven both daughters are and how she would never be able to see the day when she would see her daughters married. Uncle Billy would always comfort by assuring her that the day will come, and it did this year. 


She was really excited about the whole wedding affair, although to be honest, Kat and I were more interested in getting it over and done with just to please the parents. Just like with any families, my mother-in-law has had her arguments with other relatives, and I was surprised when those relatives turned up for our wedding. I later found out that she had made peace with them, and they duly turned up on our wedding day. Upon hindset, it must've been such a joyous occasion for her.


I had remarked to Kat during the funeral that the events that bring together long lost relatives are Chinese New Year, weddings and funeral, and true enough, the same faces that we saw at our wedding turned up for my mother-in-law's funeral. Indeed, it was under much sadder circumstances than the last time I saw them, but as they started streaming in to pay their respect, I realised that our wedding was the reason for her reconciliation with her kin. It warmed me very much to see them turning up, a sign that the peace had indeed been made. 


About an hour from their home in Kuala Lumpur is the casino city of Genting, hardly like Las Vegas because it is wholly owned by the Genting Group, with little business and residences springing up around the casinos and hotels. My mother-in-law enjoyed the occasional jaunt up to the the mountain peak where the casino is located and played with the slot machines. My parents-in-law were often candid about their trips to Genting as Kat usually frowns upon it and sees it as a waste of money, so for their last trip, I stumbled upon the details from Kat's aunt and uncle-in-law. My mother-in-law had called them up days before her passing and invited them to join my parents-in-law for a trip up to Genting. My aunt recalled that they had an enjoyable time, with my mother-in-law teaching her sister how to play the various slot machines. 


It was definitely eventful days leading up to her last moments. Uncle Billy was telling me how his wife (whom we addressed as Aunty Jenny) would often chat with mother-in-law on the phone, sometimes for even hours. According to Uncle Billy, mother-in-law was Aunt Jenny's closest relative in Kuala Lumpur, and through their last conversation, Aunt Jenny told Uncle Billy that mother-in-law sounded really happy, as if she was without care or worries. I had also found out that mother-in-law had also contacted almost all her old and some even long lost friends to catch up with them. 


I'm pretty sure that there's one or two lovely stories that my darned brain is failing to recall at this present moment, but the point remains the same. All these anecdotes, as I had told Kat, are evidence that mother-in-law was at peace when she passed on. She enjoyed her last moments of pleasure with her jaunt to Genting, saw her daughter get married, made her peace with her relatives, and spoke to her dearest friends for one last time. I could almost imagine her smiling to herself as she ticked off the last task on her list, and decided that it was indeed time to go. It was time for her to leave her disease riddled body, and to release her family their duty of having to care for her. And as she looked down upon everyone who turned up at her funeral, she must be pleased to see the people who came to pay their last respects. Kat had painted a lovely picture when we had a discussion about mother-in-law's life after death, about how mother-in-law's spirit would leave the shell that she had been burdened with, and transform into the beautiful lady that she was before she fell sick.


Letting go of someone we love is and will always be difficult. I was deeply saddened when I first received news of her passing. But when I heard all these wonderful anecdotes from her last days, it gave me reasons to smile. Her last days were that of joy, and we should celebrate that. Yes, grieving is part and parcel of expressing the loss, but let us rejoice in the fact that she had found bliss, and leaving her body was just the final act. 


To my darling wife: Cry no more, my love, dry your eyes, for it would be what she would want for you. Moving on is not about forgetting her, because we shall continue to celebrate the life that she had. 


For those of you who are grieving, I hope that this entry has brought you some joy, and I pray that you will find your own anecdotes of joy before your loved one moved on.

Honeymoon to Thailand: Chiang Mai Day 1

It's been a flurry of activities back at work after the short trip to Thailand, and I thought I better get off my lazy butt and start writing before I start forgetting the details.

This is the first non-diving trip that Kat and I had done together, and it's actually an overdue honeymoon for us. Her sister had very generously given us a 2 night stay at the luxurious Mandarin Oriental Dhara Dhevi in Chiang Mai for our wedding last year (this was the civil ceremony) and we'd been too busy to take the holiday. We decided that August would be a good time for a short break because of the National Day holiday. We also decided to do a one night stay in Bangkok so that we could visit our diving friends whom we've only "met" on the internet. Even then, it wasn't smooth sailing because we were scrambling looking for a dog hotel for Sophie (our miniature schnauzer) since the last place had to close. After many failed options, Kat's sister agreed to care for Sophie for the couple of days.

Approaching Chiang Mai

Being so close to the National Day holidays, the airport was naturally crowded with people who were looking to exploit the holiday period, but what was surprising was that there were so many people at 6am. The flight was largely uneventful, and after a nearly two hour flight, we landed at Bangkok's international Suvarnabhumi Airport, and next, it was the long walk to the domestic terminal. I played the role of a tour guide of sorts to Kat, since she'd never been to Bangkok, telling her the troubled beginnings of the airport as we walked along. We were also looking for free Wifi spots in the airport, and then found out that it was only for 15 minutes and we had to go pick up the log-in information from the airport information counters. Through our encounters with the airport workers while we walked to the domestic terminal, it'd occurred to me that the people are a lot less friendly then the wonderful warm hospitality that I had fallen in love with then I first visited Thailand in 1999. No doubt, this is something that is happening around the world, but it's just so sad because Thailand is a place that I'm really fond of.

After a long walk, we finally arrived at our boarding gate! I was really impressed that the plane was already starting to taxi at the time of departure. One interesting story as we were boarding: there was a lady who was holding up the line of passengers trying to get to their seats because she was trying to put her precious handbag in the overhead compartment in such a way that it won't be scratched, making sure that none of the other luggages would be in contact with her handbag, eventually putting the handbag on the handbag protector cover. This took a good 5 minutes, and why she didn't just put the bag in the cover or under the seat in front of her, I just cannot phantom why. 

Flying over Bangkok to Chiang Mai, the scenery change is really dramatic: from the densely built-up areas of Bangkok, to the vast green expanses as we approached Chiang Mai, lots of rice fields neatly dotting the landscape. I did however noticed that there were some parts which looked like there was too much water covering the fields, which made me wonder if it was the flooding that was inundating the northern and north-eastern parts of Thailand. 

Kat in the limousine outside the Chiang Mai airport

I'm a real worry wart when I'm traveling. Call it paranoia, but I'm worried when I'm moving around in a new city, particularly about safety. So as we were approaching Chiang Mai, Kat could see that I was starting to vex about finding our way to the hotel, and told me not to worry and that it'd all work out. Ha! I should've known better and seen through her surprise but I was so preoccupied with worrying. After picking up our luggages and walking out of the restricted area, I was looking around for the taxi booth and out of the corner of my eye, I saw a lady hotel holding a sign with our names on it. Kat had made arrangements with the hotel for our transfer! But that wasn't the end of it: when we walked out of the arrival hall, there was a classic Mercedes limousine waiting for us!! WOW! There was an old world luxe feel to it! Kat could obviously see my expression and I bet she was loving every minute of it. Such is my wife's love :)

It was a 15 minute ride from the airport to the hotel, and the staff was giving us updates on the weather, the length of the journey, etc. I'd seen pictures of the hotel via their website, so I knew what to expect of the hotel's physical features. When we arrived, we were greeted with a garland of jasmine flowers.. nice! I was quite "blah" about the hotel's reception, but upon retrospect, I guess there's no need for a large reception because the profile of the clientele meant there was no need for a large counter to deal with lots of guests. In fact, our check-in wasn't done at the counter, but at one of the cosy sofas. That was when the bouquet of roses was brought out for Kat. Ha! Very nice gesture for the honeymooners. 

After the check-in, we were driven over to our Colonial Suite in the buggy (you can call for a buggy to transport you around the 60 acre compound, or just borrow a bicycle to get around. Ooh! There's even a horse drawn carriage that goes around the compound!), and when the staff opened the door for us, my jaw dropped again. The suite is beautiful! As the name suggests, it's got all the decor of the colonial era. There was also a chilled bottle of white wine sitting in a bucket of ice, and a heart shaped box of macaron.. all for the honeymooners! The decor was in the colonial splendour, but it was decorated with beautiful Thai traditional sculptures and lithographs of the Siam of old. It's just impossible to describe the beauty of the place, so I'd let the pictures do the talking. Oh, and incidentally, the suite is bigger than our pathetic apartment back in Singapore, which is 80 square metres versus 68 square metres! The bathroom was probably the size of our bedroom. 

Entering the suite

It was a hard time pulling ourselves away from our gorgeous room, but we had to check out the sprawling compounds. There was just so much to see on the compounds, which includes private villas, buildings of traditional architecture (the designs are simply beautifully ornate!) and even rice fields! We had thought that there was some history behind some of the buildings but was surprised to find out that construction started in 2001 and was completed in 2005. Walking around the grounds, we were surprised to find that it's actually something that was recently built. You can find replicas of the Old City with its moats and ruins of fortified walls, and overgrown "secret" gardens.

We visited the shopping village (a cluster of shops located just outside the hotel's compounds) and after some thought, decided to get some tailoring done. It's definitely not as cheap as what it might cost in Bangkok (the tailor warned us that the fabric used may not be genuine cashmere or Egyptian cotton as claimed) but definitely cheaper than what you would have to pay in Singapore. I got a suit, 2 shirts and a pair of trousers made, and even Kat who was just tagging along got 3 shirts made (she had wanted just two but was so pleased with it, she made another one). The whole lot of clothes were made over 24 hours, which is a little scary considering that it's a rushed job, and while it was nicely done, if I was to be picky, I'd say that I was a tad disappointed that the finishing could've been better (loose threads) and they might've taken a bit of time to iron it. But like I said, I'm being picky. 

One of the several sculptures in the room

We hopped onto the hotel's complimentary shuttle to the night market, and the first stop was the food court because Kat wanted Thai food. Hey, where else can you get authentic Thai food? Well, maybe not a food court that's charging farang prices (which is almost twice of what you might find elsewhere), but I gotta say that the food wasn't too bad at all. Kat left me to decide what to buy, so I bought the usual pad thai and tom yum koong, as well as a oyster fried in batter with bean sprouts and spring onions. It's a crispier (and according to Kat, it's nicer too) version of the local orh lua, which is softer (a whole lot more flour, I guess) with eggs and no bean sprouts.. more of an omelette. 

The shuttle would leave the night market 2 hours after our arrival, and I thought it might not be enough time for us to walk around, but we actually managed to finish walking the place pretty quickly. I guess it's because after while, you realise that every other shop was selling the same stuff, and Kat wasn't keen on buying anything. We did however buy some singlets with the beer labels printed on them, my staple diving attire.  

Arriving back at the hotel, we found a card from housekeeping under the door, to let us know that we missed the turndown service, and to call them if we wanted them to do it. "Too much trouble", we thought, and turned in for the night. 

Stay tuned for the next post!

One of the two swimming pools. We didn't have time to swim!

The night view of the lobby building

Night view of the Colonial Suites

 

Paddles Up!

I've been involved in team sports such as soccer and rugby ever since I was a kid. After deciding to quit competitive rugby when the injuries (and medical bills) starting mounting, I meandered from sport to sport, but all of them had been individual sports where I could practice at my own time without the need for the participation of others. Sports also helped me keep the weight off, though not necessarily successful. And there's just one problem with doing a sport that doesn't require a team: you lose motivation easily.

I gotta admit that dragonboating wasn't initially my cup of tea. I'd always enjoyed rugby because it's a (frightful) combination of skills, different types of fitness, having to think constantly and quickly on my feet, and the rough and tumble. The first time I got involved in dragonboat was years ago when my then-colleague. Celine, asked me to be part of the staff dragonboat team which was then newly founded to participate in the Inter Statutory Board Games. I was still playing rugby then, and it meant taking the season off to train for dragonboat as there were a few other races which we had been signed up for. I remembered during the first training, while it was at time physically challenging especially considering that it was a whole new different sport, I thought to myself "I could get used to it!". It was refreshing because I just had to focus on rowing (I was one of the pacers, so everyone had to follow my pace!), without having to think too much on my feet (or in this case, my bum), and biggest factor of all, I could row with a peace of mind, knowing that no one is gonna come along and tackle me off the boat.


But apart from the technical aspects, what I really enjoyed about rowing was the feeling of being one as a team when everyone is in sync (which back in those days, when everyone was new to the sport, was pretty much a rarity), and the boat moving along smoothly on the water. Hearing the collective splash of the paddles, all in sync.. it was something that captivated me. The team had some good runs, including qualifying for the finals of the Public Service Games, which was held at the Singapore River. I remembered getting ready at the start line and the Police boat pulled up alongside and taking a second look at them: it was a boat full of Gurkhas! That was the last time I saw their faces, because all we saw of them subsequently was their backs! It was like their boat was motorised! Nonetheless, it was an achievement for a bunch of misfits who hardly trained and were mostly out of sync towards the end of races. I moved on to another job not long after, and that was the end of my dragonboating.


A couple of months ago, staff dragonboating once again came into my life when it was included in an event that was part of the Public Utility Board's (PUB) Singapore International Water Festival. It was supposed to be an inter-cluster event (several departments and academic faculties form a cluster), and right from the word "go!", it was competitive! Everyone was training hard although I'd missed out on several training sessions because I was in Manado diving. The cluster that I belonged too won, and by then, and I was hooked on dragonboating again.


Kat and I have a friend who's a member of a dragonboat team (Team Naga), and so I spoke to her about joining the team. Kheng is a dear friend of ours whom we got to know through scubadiving, and is a sweet and cool person.. until I started talking about dragonboating with her. She is also the team manager, so she was made very clear her expectations, and I was really surprised at this side of her. Upon hindsight, I could see that she is very passionate about the team and wanted members who are able to commit to the team, hence her demands.


We arrived at our first training an hour earlier because we were petrified of being late, and it was a good opportunity for us to check out the place and people. The varsity and school teams had been training in the morning, and so there were lots of fit young bodies around. We were starting to have the jitters!


When Kheng came, she rounded up a couple of other guys who were new to the team, and gave everyone a quick orientation, and then, we were off in the boat. The regular guys were in their cool race boat preparing for their coming race, while a couple others and the newcomers were in another boat. After some light paddling, we beached and Alvin along with a couple of the other seniors started working on our strokes as a we stood in waist deep water. We hopped back into the boat and started rowing again, and Sean the coach got onboard from the other boat and started working further on our strokes. I was really appreciative of him coming around to every rower to correct our techniques, rather than just standing from a distance and yelling out instructions. To top off the day's training, the team celebrated the birthday of one of the rowers by having him row both boats (held together by rowers in both boats).



I'm really glad that Kat jumped at the opportunity to join the team because it was another avenue of getting fit, and getting involved in a team sport. And more importantly, it was another activity in which we could do together. We had lots of fun and really appreciated the hospitality shown by the team. We're definitely looking forward to our next training! 


On a side note, I would like to pay tribute my ex-student in NTU who was the staff team's de-facto coach. Although dragonboat was managed by my colleague, Celine, I got to know Stephen through his capacity as the NTU dragonboat team captain. We later found out that his younger brother was my team mate in the club where I played rugby. When the staff team was formed, we badgered Stephen into coaching us, and he kindly obliged, although we could see that he felt a little intimidated coaching the staff, but he was always encouraging while pushing us hard. At a personal level, Stephen was the nicest boy I've met, extremely polite and humble. I'd stop and chat with him whenever we ran into each other, and I was glad when he came back to NTU to pursue his postgraduate diploma in physical education. He had all the qualities of a good teacher, and I know that he would make a difference in the students' lives. I lost contact with Stephen when I left NTU. Then on November 2007, I heard news of the tragic drowning of the 5 members of the national dragonboat team when their boat capsized at Tonle Sap River in Cambodia, and I was shocked when his name was announced as one of the fatalities. I remembered clearly the next morning, flipping through the pages of the Sunday Times, seeing his face in the papers. I broke down, remembering the wonderful person that he was, and how the families of all the young men must be feeling. 

Steph, if you were still around, I know you'd be glad and would be ever so encouraging if I'd told you that I'm starting dragonboating again. You will always be remembered!